Despite the overcast, dreary weather we Californians have been under the past week, Rob and I ventured out to explore both North and South of our new home.
Saturday, we headed about 15 miles north on Highway 101 to the seaside community of Trinidad. 300 good souls live in this adorable town on the cliffs of the sea. We parked on the edge of Indian Beach, and headed over to Trinidad Eatery and Gallery for lunch. We waited about 30 minutes for a table at the popular diner, and took in the “art” in the gallery. It was really a gift shop. We bought some native blackberry jam, postcards and a homemade biscuit for Maddy, then headed to our table. We had an amazing clam chowder and salad before heading out into the chilly weather again. We walked down the 239 steps to Indian Beach, where we had beautiful views of Trinidad Harbor and the ocean. Quite lovely. We spent the majority of the day taking photos and watching two idiots try to wade in the water, which was probably close to 50 degrees. Yikes.
Sunday we headed south on 101. Once we started to get more inland, the clouds disappeared and we saw our first sunshine in about 9 days. We first headed to Loleta, about 10 miles south of Eureka, and took in the lovely Loleta Cheese Factory. We watched through a window while some guys were making Fontina cheese. We sampled close to 34 different kinds of cheese, then settled on a Smoked Salmon Monterey Jack Cheese, some summer sausage, crackers and sodas, then headed to the Victorian village of Ferndale.
We pulled into Ferndale after about 10 minutes, and completely fell in love. The sun was shining on all the Victorian shops and restaurants, and we settled into a picnic table at the city park for our picnic. We walked down Main Street afterwards, taking in all the sights and sounds.
For those movie buffs, two movies were filmed in quaint Ferndale. The first, Outbreak, with Dustin Hoffman and Rene Russo. Secondly, The Majestic, with Jim Carrey and Martin Landau. Ferndale Repertory Theatre on Main Street was used as The Majestic theatre when they filmed in town about 5 years ago. Ferndale Rep is the company I’m hoping to audition for soon, as they are doing The Rocky Horror Show in the spring- my dream to play Magenta!!
We splurged on a piece of chocolate, then headed back on the highway. We traveled south a bit further, and hopped on the Avenue of the Giants. The Avenue is a scenic route that runs parallel to 101, traveling through the great forests filled with Giant Sequoia’s. So beautiful. We stopped at one roadside attraction, the Immortal Tree. The tree is over 1000 years old, over 15 feet in diameter, and has survived floods and fires. To see this tree is something quite magnificent, as you again wonder how something could grow so large. It was huge!!
We wanted to take in other roadside attractions, such as the Point of Confusion (??), the Eternal Tree House, Bigfoot sightings, and Drive-Thru-A-Redwood. However, we decided to stop at Riverbend Cellars to take in a wine tasting. When we stepped out of the car, we realized how inland we must have been, as it was close to 90 degrees! Only 10 miles in from the ocean, and it’s a 30 degree difference. Amazing. We sampled five different wines, and ended up buying my favorite, of course, a Cabernet. By this time, it was 5pm, and decided to head home.
I started my job yesterday at Kidsclub. I had a blast. The kids are aged first through fifth grade, and are so great. I had to help some kids with math homework, and then tried to instruct a kid on how to make a cursive G. Do schools still teach kids cursive? When the kids asked how old I was, I made them guess. One said 35- ouch. But Jonathan, a little sweetie, said I was 23. I blew him a kiss for that one. To end the day, I played Disney Monopoly with a first grader. Note to self- do not play complicated board game with someone who can't read or count past 50.
Ciao.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Better days
Well, after Tuesdays post, I had a barrage of emails to read from numerous friends (you know who you are). I love you guys, I really do. But please, do not worry. I'm feeling way better than I was that day. Call it a combination of cabin fever and PMS. Once I wrote all that stuff out and typed it in, I felt better. It got the creative juices flowing, which was all I really needed. As much as I love you guys, please understand that I'm not looking at this move as a regret, or looking back and hoping I was still in Cincinnati. I know I was stuck there. I was in a rut. Remember what I said about asking the cosmos for a little nudge? Well she answered me, and I'm not sad about what she dealt out. But Jason is right- this is a huge adjustment. I never expected it would be easy. It just didn't hit me until we were here that all my friends are there and I am here. That's the only hard part. I talked to B last night, and he helped me to realize that. It isn't that I don't like it here. The North Coast is one of, if not the most, beautiful places I have ever experienced in my life. I just don't have a Chuck, or a Charlie, or a B to call when I need to chat. It's all small talk for now, which I guess I'll live with until I can make some friends I really connect with. It took me a good two years in Cincinnati to do that (but that was my own fault for not doing any theatre for the first two years we lived there). Anyway, I just needed to vent. Plus, it helped that the past few days have been filled with stuff to do! So I wasn't sitting around pondering why I never went after Eric Heaton... although part of me will always wonder because that boy was HOT!!
Wednesday was good as Rob was home by noon. Being married to professor is pretty cool now, as he is done at 11 on Wednesdays and doesn't work Fridays! We went down to this little deli in Old Town with the best sandwiches we had had in a long time. We then headed to the Sheriff's station, as I needed to get my fingerprints done for my new job. We headed to Patricks Candy Shop just down the block afterward for some chocolate-dipped strawberries! YUM.
Next, we headed to the Sequoia Park Zoo- yep, the same one I visited back in July. Bill the Chimp was still MIA, so we headed to the park next door and marveled at the redwoods. Came home and had french onion soup, which did a number to my belly. I sat on the couch the rest of the night, clutched over in pain, not sure if I was going to shit or puke. Luckily, I did neither. Just laid in bed on my left side, hoping for some relief. I ended up falling asleep just like that.
Awoke this morning, still a little oogy, but went to training for my new job! The weather this morning was overcast and foggy until about 2pm, and the high at 9am was a chilly 45 degrees. Yes people, gotta love the North Coast in August. Anyway, the gals at my new job are super fun and fabulous. Very team-oriented and fun. I can't wait until Monday when I get to meet the kids. Tomorrow we set up the room and get our activities planned. I'm very excited. Sure the money isn't fabulous, but I think I would so much rather do this than work a desk job I'm going to loathe. For me, it's more about quality of life. And this will make me feel rewarded... like I'm contributing to the greater good. And that's a great feeling.
This afternoon, the sun came out, so Maddy and I headed over to Sequoia Park and took some photos of the trees and great beauty. It was a great day, despite my intestinal disgusting-ness.
The fun news is this- I made up some fliers with those tabs on the bottom, with my name, email and phone number, to advertise for voice lessons. Rob put them up all over HSU, and informed me most of them are empty of tabs! I'm so excited, as I've gotten a few emails in just two days. I'm really hoping this works out, as you all know, teaching is just one of my many passions I'm happy to continue here in California. Wow. Isn't that weird? Just to hear (or type) "I am a California resident". It's really kinda cool.
Wednesday was good as Rob was home by noon. Being married to professor is pretty cool now, as he is done at 11 on Wednesdays and doesn't work Fridays! We went down to this little deli in Old Town with the best sandwiches we had had in a long time. We then headed to the Sheriff's station, as I needed to get my fingerprints done for my new job. We headed to Patricks Candy Shop just down the block afterward for some chocolate-dipped strawberries! YUM.
Next, we headed to the Sequoia Park Zoo- yep, the same one I visited back in July. Bill the Chimp was still MIA, so we headed to the park next door and marveled at the redwoods. Came home and had french onion soup, which did a number to my belly. I sat on the couch the rest of the night, clutched over in pain, not sure if I was going to shit or puke. Luckily, I did neither. Just laid in bed on my left side, hoping for some relief. I ended up falling asleep just like that.
Awoke this morning, still a little oogy, but went to training for my new job! The weather this morning was overcast and foggy until about 2pm, and the high at 9am was a chilly 45 degrees. Yes people, gotta love the North Coast in August. Anyway, the gals at my new job are super fun and fabulous. Very team-oriented and fun. I can't wait until Monday when I get to meet the kids. Tomorrow we set up the room and get our activities planned. I'm very excited. Sure the money isn't fabulous, but I think I would so much rather do this than work a desk job I'm going to loathe. For me, it's more about quality of life. And this will make me feel rewarded... like I'm contributing to the greater good. And that's a great feeling.
This afternoon, the sun came out, so Maddy and I headed over to Sequoia Park and took some photos of the trees and great beauty. It was a great day, despite my intestinal disgusting-ness.
The fun news is this- I made up some fliers with those tabs on the bottom, with my name, email and phone number, to advertise for voice lessons. Rob put them up all over HSU, and informed me most of them are empty of tabs! I'm so excited, as I've gotten a few emails in just two days. I'm really hoping this works out, as you all know, teaching is just one of my many passions I'm happy to continue here in California. Wow. Isn't that weird? Just to hear (or type) "I am a California resident". It's really kinda cool.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Okay, it’s time for me to get real. What is the point of having an online journal if you can’t spill your innermost feelings, right?
I am miserable. I really am. I’m so dismally depressed most days, that I try anything and everything I can to keep my mind off of how ripped from my life I feel. Anything to fill the void. I think it’s mostly because I have NOTHING to do the majority of the day. I get up, do pilates, shower. Take the dog for a walk, have lunch. Play Age of Empires for hours on end. I eat. I take naps. I can’t wait for my new job to start so I can get the F*%K out of the house and do something.
Because of course when you have a lot of time on your hands with nothing to do, you think. At least that is what I do. And the only things I tend to think about it how much I miss Cincinnati. How I miss the familiarity of it. Of driving through town and knowing that in a few hours, I’d be meeting Chuck and Charlie at Mary’s. I miss my friends. I don’t know anyone here. My neighbor Amy is very nice, and when I see her we usually stop and chat for 20 minutes or so. She’s very easy to talk to, and she has a dog, too, so it’s easy to begin talking about stuff with her.
I think it’s easy for Rob. He is meeting new people everyday at school. And while I’m happy and excited for him, I can’t shake the loneliness I feel. And I’m not the type to go down to the local coffee shop and just sit down with a complete stranger and strike up a conversation.
I miss the ease of having someone to talk to. Most times, I don’t want to tell Rob how I’m feeling because he’ll try to fix it, which really pisses me off. I understand that men feel they need to fix things- it’s that whole hunter/gatherer mentality from thousands of years ago. They carry around their little toolbox to try and remedy anything they can. And all I really need is someone to just listen to me, with no interruptions about how he would do things if he were in my position.
What is this fear of being emotionally intimate with a man? Do all women feel that way, or is it just me? I know why I feel that way. Let’s face it, seeing a therapist every other week was really about me figuring out why I don’t feel present in my own life. I wish I could be that way with men. Especially Rob. But it’s that whole abandonment matter. If I let myself be close to someone, they’ll just leave. And inside, I know this one won’t. But maybe it’s because I don’t want to hear what he’ll say. I want it to be my way. On my terms. Well, I’ve learned it just doesn’t work that way. It never has or will. Linda (my therapist) always said the only thing we can control is our reactions and responses to what life hands us. Right now, I feel like I’m doing a pretty shitty job.
It makes me think of so many things. It makes me ponder what it is I really want to do in my life. What is it that is going to make me feel 100%? What will make me whole? I’ve always wanted to perform. I’ve always wanted to direct. I still want to publish those two plays I’ve written that are getting dusty on the shelf, plus a pile of other fiction I’ve been working on for years and years. I want to be a photographer. I want to write and direct my own film. I want to get my masters in theatre. I want to learn to play the guitar. And which one of these will I ultimately do? Shit, I’d love to do all of them. But where do I start?
And this bog I’m in makes me think of regrets. I have so many. I know we all do. But when I was young, I thought to myself that I would live my life without them. I saw Dead Poets Society too many times. Or read A Separate Peace way too much as a teenager. Carpe Diem. Didn’t that mean to live your life with excitement and verve and don’t ever compromise your ideals for anyone or anything? Christ, I should’ve gone parasailing at South Padre Island at age 15 when I went on vacation with my Dad. I should’ve walked outside when Eric Heaton gestured for me to, outside of a bar in the heat of summer, 1999. I hate to think of what I missed out on because I was dating someone else who ultimately shit all over me. I should’ve kissed Dave. And Mike. And Ryan. I should’ve told countless boys how I really felt about them in the last 12 years or so without wanting anything in return, except the gratification of actually doing it. I should’ve submitted all the photos or poems or short stories to the innumerable calls for entry over the years.
But you know what? I makes me also realize the things I am in control of. How I’m finally going to write that letter to my mother and thank her for all the wonderful memories I have of childhood, even if it was really f’ed up.
How I waited six long years to perform, only to realize how much more amazing it felt because I had six years of life experience to make me feel like a woman onstage, no longer a girl.
That I take great photographs.
That I’m going to pursue every passion I possibly can. Even if I’m 76 and want to learn to jig. I’ll do it.
That I’m a great voice teacher. That I make a difference. That kids really look up to me.
That it’s okay to tell Eric, or Dave, or Mike, or Ryan that I really wanted to. Even now. You know why? Because it’s never too late....
I am miserable. I really am. I’m so dismally depressed most days, that I try anything and everything I can to keep my mind off of how ripped from my life I feel. Anything to fill the void. I think it’s mostly because I have NOTHING to do the majority of the day. I get up, do pilates, shower. Take the dog for a walk, have lunch. Play Age of Empires for hours on end. I eat. I take naps. I can’t wait for my new job to start so I can get the F*%K out of the house and do something.
Because of course when you have a lot of time on your hands with nothing to do, you think. At least that is what I do. And the only things I tend to think about it how much I miss Cincinnati. How I miss the familiarity of it. Of driving through town and knowing that in a few hours, I’d be meeting Chuck and Charlie at Mary’s. I miss my friends. I don’t know anyone here. My neighbor Amy is very nice, and when I see her we usually stop and chat for 20 minutes or so. She’s very easy to talk to, and she has a dog, too, so it’s easy to begin talking about stuff with her.
I think it’s easy for Rob. He is meeting new people everyday at school. And while I’m happy and excited for him, I can’t shake the loneliness I feel. And I’m not the type to go down to the local coffee shop and just sit down with a complete stranger and strike up a conversation.
I miss the ease of having someone to talk to. Most times, I don’t want to tell Rob how I’m feeling because he’ll try to fix it, which really pisses me off. I understand that men feel they need to fix things- it’s that whole hunter/gatherer mentality from thousands of years ago. They carry around their little toolbox to try and remedy anything they can. And all I really need is someone to just listen to me, with no interruptions about how he would do things if he were in my position.
What is this fear of being emotionally intimate with a man? Do all women feel that way, or is it just me? I know why I feel that way. Let’s face it, seeing a therapist every other week was really about me figuring out why I don’t feel present in my own life. I wish I could be that way with men. Especially Rob. But it’s that whole abandonment matter. If I let myself be close to someone, they’ll just leave. And inside, I know this one won’t. But maybe it’s because I don’t want to hear what he’ll say. I want it to be my way. On my terms. Well, I’ve learned it just doesn’t work that way. It never has or will. Linda (my therapist) always said the only thing we can control is our reactions and responses to what life hands us. Right now, I feel like I’m doing a pretty shitty job.
It makes me think of so many things. It makes me ponder what it is I really want to do in my life. What is it that is going to make me feel 100%? What will make me whole? I’ve always wanted to perform. I’ve always wanted to direct. I still want to publish those two plays I’ve written that are getting dusty on the shelf, plus a pile of other fiction I’ve been working on for years and years. I want to be a photographer. I want to write and direct my own film. I want to get my masters in theatre. I want to learn to play the guitar. And which one of these will I ultimately do? Shit, I’d love to do all of them. But where do I start?
And this bog I’m in makes me think of regrets. I have so many. I know we all do. But when I was young, I thought to myself that I would live my life without them. I saw Dead Poets Society too many times. Or read A Separate Peace way too much as a teenager. Carpe Diem. Didn’t that mean to live your life with excitement and verve and don’t ever compromise your ideals for anyone or anything? Christ, I should’ve gone parasailing at South Padre Island at age 15 when I went on vacation with my Dad. I should’ve walked outside when Eric Heaton gestured for me to, outside of a bar in the heat of summer, 1999. I hate to think of what I missed out on because I was dating someone else who ultimately shit all over me. I should’ve kissed Dave. And Mike. And Ryan. I should’ve told countless boys how I really felt about them in the last 12 years or so without wanting anything in return, except the gratification of actually doing it. I should’ve submitted all the photos or poems or short stories to the innumerable calls for entry over the years.
But you know what? I makes me also realize the things I am in control of. How I’m finally going to write that letter to my mother and thank her for all the wonderful memories I have of childhood, even if it was really f’ed up.
How I waited six long years to perform, only to realize how much more amazing it felt because I had six years of life experience to make me feel like a woman onstage, no longer a girl.
That I take great photographs.
That I’m going to pursue every passion I possibly can. Even if I’m 76 and want to learn to jig. I’ll do it.
That I’m a great voice teacher. That I make a difference. That kids really look up to me.
That it’s okay to tell Eric, or Dave, or Mike, or Ryan that I really wanted to. Even now. You know why? Because it’s never too late....
Monday, August 21, 2006
Weekly Update
California- What a different world. Especially after living in Cincinnati for four years. Where everyone is in a hurry. It's rush rush rush in the Nati. Here, it's very slow. And there are no SUV's. Gas is $3.40 a gallon, and everyone here is so Earth conscious. The commute is so much shorter than in Cincinnati. My biggest commute will be 10 miles. Much better than the 30 mile commute to Mason during the week. We've been here 11 days and I still have half a tank of gas.
Weather- The climate here is very strange. It's always foggy/cloudy in the morning. What Humboldt county calls The Redwood Curtain. Sometimes the fog is so thick it keeps locals in for days, not able to go anywhere except in town. Usually by noon, the sun has burned off the clouds and fog, and it's gorgeous the rest of the day. The highest it gets in temp. is about 62 degrees. It feels like fall all the time.
Work- Yes friends, I got a job. I'm totally excited to start, as I'll be a recreation leader for an after school program in McKinleyville (just 10 miles up 101). It's only after school on weekdays- no evenings or weekends. This is perfect as it leaves my nights and weekends open to teach and perform. On Saturdays, I'll be teaching three classes at Humboldt Music Academy. The director, Kit, has let given me complete creative freedom in getting classes going. I'm teaching two sections of a class I'm calling Music Explorers. One for 2-3 year olds, and one for 4-5 year olds. We'll be listening/dancing/singing to different world musics every two weeks. And both the classes are full! I'll be teaching Class Voice for kids, age 9-12, as well. I'm totally excited.
Exploring- Rob and I have been getting to know our surroundings the past week or so. We visited an apple farm last week, owned by this old burnt-out hippie lady dressed in baggy jeans and tie-dye. We're trying to find a grocery store comparable to Kroger, but groceries in CA are quite expensive. We'll try another store this weekend, as we've tried two different ones the past couple weeks. Friday we had dinner at the Samoa Cookhouse, this old logging restaurant that feeds you family-style, reminiscent of the way lumberjacks would eat a hundred years ago. It's right on the Samoa Dunes, or "spit", just a minute from the ocean. The food was mediocre, and they just kept bringing it. Soup, salad, bread, fried stuff, potatoes, coffee, dessert. It was disgusting. But now we can say we did it and never go back. Saturday we spent the day in Arcata, where HSU is located. It's so very hippie. Kids with dreadlocks on skateboards, the farmers market. We walked around and saw a peace demonstration in the Plaza while people were buying their fresh vegies and flowers from the market. What a sight. Sunday we attended a BBQ, held by the chair of the HSU music department, Ken Ayoob. What a nice guy. He's originally from Boston, and has that sort of East coast attitude about him. He reminds me of Kenny Goldholf. And two of the music faculty (other than Rob) went to CCM. It was fun talking about Cincinnati stuff with them. But all in all, I still felt uncomfortable. It's that whole small talk thing. Or talking shop thing. It was fun for a while, when we were talking about Weight Watchers and Atkins and movies and stuff like that. But once they started talking shop, I needed to get the F out of there. Yes, I'm a musician. But I think what makes me a good one is that I don't have to sit in a room full of them and use big words and flaunt the fact that I know this that and the other about music. I just want to be a person. I just want to talk about interesting things. Music is my great love, my passion, my life. I live it every day. I don't want to have to talk about it every second of that day.
Thanksgiving- Rob and I won't be able to make it home for Thanksgiving. It's way too expensive, and we're planning to come home for Christmas anyway. But because we can't make it home, we are planning a trip to Wine Country! Sonoma is only about 4 1/2 hours by car. We found a great, inexpensive room to stay in- because it's after the harvest, Wine Country is way cheap to visit!- at the same place we stayed on our honeymoon. We thought it would be nice to get back, drink some amazing wine, eat some amazing food and come home three days later relaxed. Plus, since Rob barfed the first three days of our honeymoon due to the stomach flu, we thought this would be a nice little getaway. Plus we don't have airfare to worry about, so it will be relatively cheap.
All for now, kiddies.
Weather- The climate here is very strange. It's always foggy/cloudy in the morning. What Humboldt county calls The Redwood Curtain. Sometimes the fog is so thick it keeps locals in for days, not able to go anywhere except in town. Usually by noon, the sun has burned off the clouds and fog, and it's gorgeous the rest of the day. The highest it gets in temp. is about 62 degrees. It feels like fall all the time.
Work- Yes friends, I got a job. I'm totally excited to start, as I'll be a recreation leader for an after school program in McKinleyville (just 10 miles up 101). It's only after school on weekdays- no evenings or weekends. This is perfect as it leaves my nights and weekends open to teach and perform. On Saturdays, I'll be teaching three classes at Humboldt Music Academy. The director, Kit, has let given me complete creative freedom in getting classes going. I'm teaching two sections of a class I'm calling Music Explorers. One for 2-3 year olds, and one for 4-5 year olds. We'll be listening/dancing/singing to different world musics every two weeks. And both the classes are full! I'll be teaching Class Voice for kids, age 9-12, as well. I'm totally excited.
Exploring- Rob and I have been getting to know our surroundings the past week or so. We visited an apple farm last week, owned by this old burnt-out hippie lady dressed in baggy jeans and tie-dye. We're trying to find a grocery store comparable to Kroger, but groceries in CA are quite expensive. We'll try another store this weekend, as we've tried two different ones the past couple weeks. Friday we had dinner at the Samoa Cookhouse, this old logging restaurant that feeds you family-style, reminiscent of the way lumberjacks would eat a hundred years ago. It's right on the Samoa Dunes, or "spit", just a minute from the ocean. The food was mediocre, and they just kept bringing it. Soup, salad, bread, fried stuff, potatoes, coffee, dessert. It was disgusting. But now we can say we did it and never go back. Saturday we spent the day in Arcata, where HSU is located. It's so very hippie. Kids with dreadlocks on skateboards, the farmers market. We walked around and saw a peace demonstration in the Plaza while people were buying their fresh vegies and flowers from the market. What a sight. Sunday we attended a BBQ, held by the chair of the HSU music department, Ken Ayoob. What a nice guy. He's originally from Boston, and has that sort of East coast attitude about him. He reminds me of Kenny Goldholf. And two of the music faculty (other than Rob) went to CCM. It was fun talking about Cincinnati stuff with them. But all in all, I still felt uncomfortable. It's that whole small talk thing. Or talking shop thing. It was fun for a while, when we were talking about Weight Watchers and Atkins and movies and stuff like that. But once they started talking shop, I needed to get the F out of there. Yes, I'm a musician. But I think what makes me a good one is that I don't have to sit in a room full of them and use big words and flaunt the fact that I know this that and the other about music. I just want to be a person. I just want to talk about interesting things. Music is my great love, my passion, my life. I live it every day. I don't want to have to talk about it every second of that day.
Thanksgiving- Rob and I won't be able to make it home for Thanksgiving. It's way too expensive, and we're planning to come home for Christmas anyway. But because we can't make it home, we are planning a trip to Wine Country! Sonoma is only about 4 1/2 hours by car. We found a great, inexpensive room to stay in- because it's after the harvest, Wine Country is way cheap to visit!- at the same place we stayed on our honeymoon. We thought it would be nice to get back, drink some amazing wine, eat some amazing food and come home three days later relaxed. Plus, since Rob barfed the first three days of our honeymoon due to the stomach flu, we thought this would be a nice little getaway. Plus we don't have airfare to worry about, so it will be relatively cheap.
All for now, kiddies.
Friday, August 18, 2006
Nature's Glory
I had the utmost pleasure of spending the afternoon at Redwoods State Park in Arcata, just a few minutes walk to Humboldt State University. Before I knew it, I had hiked a half mile, just looking up at these mammoth trees.
Have you ever seen a redwood tree up close? It's really like nothing you'll ever experience. All I could do was stand in wonder at how something could have grown so large and magnificent. How long had these trees been here? How long before us? Before people? It made me realize that Mother Nature isn't just Mother, she is goddess. I often felt that I was in a forest of ents, and that they would all come alive and take me off to see the White Wizard ala Lord of the Rings.
The coolest thing I saw was this giant stump. This thing was so huge- look at it standing next to the other redwoods close to it, and that will tell you the diameter of this mother. It was HUGE.
And here is Maddy experiencing the ocean for the first time. Isn't she just the cutest thing?
By the way, many of you know, but some of you don't. I got a job! I'll be working part time in the afternoons as a Recreation Leader for an after-school program. I'm really excited because I get to do something I'm passionate about, which is being with kids. It leaves my nights and weekends free for teaching and theatre, and most importantly, writing. I was feeling a little stunted creatively the past two weeks, but it's coming back. I think being in such a beautiful place gives me some pretty great inspiration.
Have you ever seen a redwood tree up close? It's really like nothing you'll ever experience. All I could do was stand in wonder at how something could have grown so large and magnificent. How long had these trees been here? How long before us? Before people? It made me realize that Mother Nature isn't just Mother, she is goddess. I often felt that I was in a forest of ents, and that they would all come alive and take me off to see the White Wizard ala Lord of the Rings.
The coolest thing I saw was this giant stump. This thing was so huge- look at it standing next to the other redwoods close to it, and that will tell you the diameter of this mother. It was HUGE.
And here is Maddy experiencing the ocean for the first time. Isn't she just the cutest thing?
By the way, many of you know, but some of you don't. I got a job! I'll be working part time in the afternoons as a Recreation Leader for an after-school program. I'm really excited because I get to do something I'm passionate about, which is being with kids. It leaves my nights and weekends free for teaching and theatre, and most importantly, writing. I was feeling a little stunted creatively the past two weeks, but it's coming back. I think being in such a beautiful place gives me some pretty great inspiration.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Pics from the road
Blogger has finally let me post pics. Enjoy!
Here is one of Maddy on her doggie downers. Look at those eyes!
Ah, the beautiful redwoods of California.
I thought this one was funny.
Driving through the endless Bonneville Salt Flats, Mad and I took some time to rock out to some Zeppelin.
The morning of Day 3.
Here is one of Maddy on her doggie downers. Look at those eyes!
Ah, the beautiful redwoods of California.
I thought this one was funny.
Driving through the endless Bonneville Salt Flats, Mad and I took some time to rock out to some Zeppelin.
The morning of Day 3.
Culture Shock
Wow is this place different. There are so many little nuances that you never see in the midwest. Like people smoking pot outdoors. For the entire world to see! And a lady getting out of her car in stopped traffic, grabbing a wildflower growing at the side of the road, putting it in her hair, and getting back in her car.
There is a sort of European way of life out here. People don't work themselves to death. They enjoy life, and want to experience the happiness of their lives without working 10 hour days. They'll work maybe a five hour day, take a long lunch, go home and smoke up.
There is also an ideal of getting quality goods and products out here. Nothing is half-assed. Food tastes better out here. People want to provide and get something in return. I found that in the midwest, there is a sort of mediocrity to many ideas and ways of life. Not out here. It's quality here. Portion size is not gargantuan. Coffee is roasted with the utmost pride. People take great pains to make things worth while for the whole community. I dig that.
Tonight was the first HSU function I attended with Rob. It was at the beautiful Redwood State Park (hello?! SO Gorgeous!). HSU catered a Meet and Greet for all new faculty and their families. We met some very cool people, like Jamie and his wife Molly, who originally hail from Freeport, Illinois (!) but spent the last two years in Belfast, Ireland. Jamie is a new professor of green construction management. This means he is very into renewable energy sources and learning how to make the Earth a more healthy and sound place through safe construction practices. Very cool. They brought their beautiful Lab mix Bengal. We commented on how proud we were, after living in Cincinnati for four years. And the BBQ was quite California, with your choice of hamburger, hot dog, or vegie burger. Since we're living in such a Earth/health conscious state now, Rob and I have decided to become vegetarians, whose only meat source is fish. We've been doing quite well (and happy to say I've been doing pilates and back in the size 10's again!).
HSU also brings some very cool entertainment to campus. This year, Ani DiFranco is coming for a concert, as well as Garrison Keilor and the Prairie Home Companion. Bill Cosby is coming, and since Rob is a faculty member, we get to see these and so much more for chump change! I'm sooooo excited!
Well, I'm tired. Off to bed. More soon!
There is a sort of European way of life out here. People don't work themselves to death. They enjoy life, and want to experience the happiness of their lives without working 10 hour days. They'll work maybe a five hour day, take a long lunch, go home and smoke up.
There is also an ideal of getting quality goods and products out here. Nothing is half-assed. Food tastes better out here. People want to provide and get something in return. I found that in the midwest, there is a sort of mediocrity to many ideas and ways of life. Not out here. It's quality here. Portion size is not gargantuan. Coffee is roasted with the utmost pride. People take great pains to make things worth while for the whole community. I dig that.
Tonight was the first HSU function I attended with Rob. It was at the beautiful Redwood State Park (hello?! SO Gorgeous!). HSU catered a Meet and Greet for all new faculty and their families. We met some very cool people, like Jamie and his wife Molly, who originally hail from Freeport, Illinois (!) but spent the last two years in Belfast, Ireland. Jamie is a new professor of green construction management. This means he is very into renewable energy sources and learning how to make the Earth a more healthy and sound place through safe construction practices. Very cool. They brought their beautiful Lab mix Bengal. We commented on how proud we were, after living in Cincinnati for four years. And the BBQ was quite California, with your choice of hamburger, hot dog, or vegie burger. Since we're living in such a Earth/health conscious state now, Rob and I have decided to become vegetarians, whose only meat source is fish. We've been doing quite well (and happy to say I've been doing pilates and back in the size 10's again!).
HSU also brings some very cool entertainment to campus. This year, Ani DiFranco is coming for a concert, as well as Garrison Keilor and the Prairie Home Companion. Bill Cosby is coming, and since Rob is a faculty member, we get to see these and so much more for chump change! I'm sooooo excited!
Well, I'm tired. Off to bed. More soon!
Sunday, August 13, 2006
In the Journey
It truly is In the journey, just as Martin Sexton says so eloquently in his song. "We gotta dig deep down inside and hold on". To our strength, our minds, our sanity. I didn't know how much strength and power I would need to get through the last 9 days, but now that I've been through the experience, I can honestly say I've been through the journey. And it sucked.
DAY 1
We awoke around 6 Tuesday morning, got all of our stuff in the car (after spending three days at home in Illinois visiting the folks and friends). Gave Maddy her tranquilizers and we got in the car. We hopped on I-280 around into Iowa, and it was a straight shot from Davenport into Omaha, Nebraska. It rained and sprinkled the majority of the time throughout Iowa and into Nebraska, but nothing we couldn't handle. We averaged close to 70 MPH, which is pretty good considering driving the moving van while towing the one car.
Ever driven through Nebraska? I do not recommend it. It is flat and, well, flat. And boring. And really flat. With nothing to look at. For 454 miles. Enough said.
The first day was okay, considering the Hyundai doesn't have cruise control OR a CD player. I listened to a lot of NPR.
Maddy, despite being on doggie downers, kept thinking she was missing something. So the poor thing was so sedated, her eyes drooping like crazy and skin hanging off her face, yet she stood the entire day with her head on my shoulder looking out the windows.
We arrived in Cheyenne, Wyoming around 8pm. We checked into our room at the Motel 6 and ordered chinese food. We fell into bed, exhausted, after a shower.
DAY 1 Stats-
Hours in the car- 14
States driven through- Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Wyoming
Number of times I heard the word "Jesus" or "Scripture" on the radio- 456,738,927,345
DAY 2- Day in Hell
We left Cheyenne around 6:30am and stopped in Laramie for gas and breakfast. Driving through Laramie, I thought about Matthew Shephard, the young gay student attending U of W who was brutally beaten and murdered. Moises Kaufman and the Tectonic Theatre Company beautifully wrote and produced The Laramie Project, a play about the beating and death of Matthew. It was hard not to think about him while passing through.
We crossed over into Utah after lunchtime. Utah was probably the state we spent the shortest amount of time in, and was the most beautiful. We drove through many mountain ranges from Wyoming to California, and near Salt Lake was the prettiest. Although after you get past Salt Lake City, you have the Bonneville Salt Flats to contend with. For miles upon endless miles of flat, hot Earth that looks like snow. After about 90 miles of salt, we finally reached the Nevada border. My dear husband miscalculated the mileage from the Nevada state line to our stop that evening in Winnemucca. He thought 178 miles. It turned out to be 250 miles, which added another hour and a half to our travel time. Needless to say, I was a little pissed off, not to mention exhausted beyond all belief. To kill time, I called Keith, talked to Lesley on the phone, texted just about everyone I knew. We arrived (finally!) in Winnemucca, Nevada at 8:30 pm. We again checked into our Motel 6 room, got a bucket of KFC and fell to sleep.
DAY 2 stats-
Hours in the car- 15!!!
States driven through- Wyoming, Utah, Nevada
Fun fact- Winnemucca is most famous for it's still-in-operation whorehouse
DAY 3- Holy Crap, is this trip ever going to end?
Awoke again at 6am and got ourselves in the car. By this time, we were completely exhausted. Maddy would no longer take her "Stummies", which is code word for Doggie Downers. She would smell that peanut butter on bread and know instantly that it would make her sleepy. My digestive system was so wound up from eating fast food and having blood sugar spikes for the past three days. And Rob would often throw a tantrum if something didn't go his way. The car smelled like dog piss, human stink and fried food. We were ready to just f#%$ng get there already. About 20 miles outside of Reno, B called to check in and said "Jesus, you sound exhausted"... and it was only 8:30 in the morning.
We crossed over into Calfornia a little after 10am! Yahoo!!! The drive up through Lake Tahoe was so beautiful- exactly how I had remembered it the last time I had driven through, some 12 years ago with my Dad and family on a summer vacation. We made it just north of Sacramento around 1 that afternoon. And boy was it hot. The California desert is hot and ugly. We hopped on the 5 and made our way north to the 20, which would take us on our last road, 101, north to Eureka.
The 20 was this little mountain road, winding and curvy around Clearlake, CA. After about 10 minutes of driving this pass, I thought I was going to yak. But it took us about 2 hours to get through to 101, and this when I almost lost my mind. Knowing we only had about 162 miles left of the journey, I really started to freak out. I felt as if I was having a nervous breakdown, anxiety attack, whatever you want to call it. It was bad. And no one told us that 101 is ALSO a mountain road, winding its way this way and that for about 70 miles. It was fun for about 20 minutes, driving through the redwoods and seeing nature in all it's glory. Yet I was as tired as I've ever been. Tired of being in the car. Tired of stinking. Tired of Maddy drueling on my shoulder. I didn't care anymore. I started to get depressed, like I was driving on the road to nowhere. I look back now and realize it was lack of fluids and exhaustion.
We finally arrived in Eureka around 6:30pm. I cried. It was that good.
DAY 3 stats-
Hours in car- 12
States driven through- Nevada and California
Number of times I almost barfed- 10
We are unpacked. There is food in the fridge. And the weather is gorgeous. We've been lucky to have four days of sunshine and cool weather. We went to the beach Saturday night and gave Maddy her first experience with the ocean, which was hysterical, by the way. Watching her discover the waves trying to chase her was priceless.
Yes, I'm homesick. For Cincinnati. I miss you guys a lot. I miss the idea of you. It's a whole different world out here. The neighbor really does sit on his porch and smoke for the whole world to see. I've never seen so many people with dreadlocks in my life. But everyone is an artist of some type or another. We have a crazy old dude who lives down the street. Our neighbor Amy warned us about him. Amy is a weaver who has a dog named Sally. Sally doesn't like Maddy too much... yet. Anyway, crazy old artist dude down the street has a giant ceramic head in his front yard. Along with a giant ceramic tree. I'm trying to get Maddy to pee on the creepy head. Hasn't happened yet.
Please call or email me. I'm desperate for a friendly voice!
Pictures to come soon. I keep trying but blogger won't let me post any. Maybe it's just my computer.
Love ya!
DAY 1
We awoke around 6 Tuesday morning, got all of our stuff in the car (after spending three days at home in Illinois visiting the folks and friends). Gave Maddy her tranquilizers and we got in the car. We hopped on I-280 around into Iowa, and it was a straight shot from Davenport into Omaha, Nebraska. It rained and sprinkled the majority of the time throughout Iowa and into Nebraska, but nothing we couldn't handle. We averaged close to 70 MPH, which is pretty good considering driving the moving van while towing the one car.
Ever driven through Nebraska? I do not recommend it. It is flat and, well, flat. And boring. And really flat. With nothing to look at. For 454 miles. Enough said.
The first day was okay, considering the Hyundai doesn't have cruise control OR a CD player. I listened to a lot of NPR.
Maddy, despite being on doggie downers, kept thinking she was missing something. So the poor thing was so sedated, her eyes drooping like crazy and skin hanging off her face, yet she stood the entire day with her head on my shoulder looking out the windows.
We arrived in Cheyenne, Wyoming around 8pm. We checked into our room at the Motel 6 and ordered chinese food. We fell into bed, exhausted, after a shower.
DAY 1 Stats-
Hours in the car- 14
States driven through- Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Wyoming
Number of times I heard the word "Jesus" or "Scripture" on the radio- 456,738,927,345
DAY 2- Day in Hell
We left Cheyenne around 6:30am and stopped in Laramie for gas and breakfast. Driving through Laramie, I thought about Matthew Shephard, the young gay student attending U of W who was brutally beaten and murdered. Moises Kaufman and the Tectonic Theatre Company beautifully wrote and produced The Laramie Project, a play about the beating and death of Matthew. It was hard not to think about him while passing through.
We crossed over into Utah after lunchtime. Utah was probably the state we spent the shortest amount of time in, and was the most beautiful. We drove through many mountain ranges from Wyoming to California, and near Salt Lake was the prettiest. Although after you get past Salt Lake City, you have the Bonneville Salt Flats to contend with. For miles upon endless miles of flat, hot Earth that looks like snow. After about 90 miles of salt, we finally reached the Nevada border. My dear husband miscalculated the mileage from the Nevada state line to our stop that evening in Winnemucca. He thought 178 miles. It turned out to be 250 miles, which added another hour and a half to our travel time. Needless to say, I was a little pissed off, not to mention exhausted beyond all belief. To kill time, I called Keith, talked to Lesley on the phone, texted just about everyone I knew. We arrived (finally!) in Winnemucca, Nevada at 8:30 pm. We again checked into our Motel 6 room, got a bucket of KFC and fell to sleep.
DAY 2 stats-
Hours in the car- 15!!!
States driven through- Wyoming, Utah, Nevada
Fun fact- Winnemucca is most famous for it's still-in-operation whorehouse
DAY 3- Holy Crap, is this trip ever going to end?
Awoke again at 6am and got ourselves in the car. By this time, we were completely exhausted. Maddy would no longer take her "Stummies", which is code word for Doggie Downers. She would smell that peanut butter on bread and know instantly that it would make her sleepy. My digestive system was so wound up from eating fast food and having blood sugar spikes for the past three days. And Rob would often throw a tantrum if something didn't go his way. The car smelled like dog piss, human stink and fried food. We were ready to just f#%$ng get there already. About 20 miles outside of Reno, B called to check in and said "Jesus, you sound exhausted"... and it was only 8:30 in the morning.
We crossed over into Calfornia a little after 10am! Yahoo!!! The drive up through Lake Tahoe was so beautiful- exactly how I had remembered it the last time I had driven through, some 12 years ago with my Dad and family on a summer vacation. We made it just north of Sacramento around 1 that afternoon. And boy was it hot. The California desert is hot and ugly. We hopped on the 5 and made our way north to the 20, which would take us on our last road, 101, north to Eureka.
The 20 was this little mountain road, winding and curvy around Clearlake, CA. After about 10 minutes of driving this pass, I thought I was going to yak. But it took us about 2 hours to get through to 101, and this when I almost lost my mind. Knowing we only had about 162 miles left of the journey, I really started to freak out. I felt as if I was having a nervous breakdown, anxiety attack, whatever you want to call it. It was bad. And no one told us that 101 is ALSO a mountain road, winding its way this way and that for about 70 miles. It was fun for about 20 minutes, driving through the redwoods and seeing nature in all it's glory. Yet I was as tired as I've ever been. Tired of being in the car. Tired of stinking. Tired of Maddy drueling on my shoulder. I didn't care anymore. I started to get depressed, like I was driving on the road to nowhere. I look back now and realize it was lack of fluids and exhaustion.
We finally arrived in Eureka around 6:30pm. I cried. It was that good.
DAY 3 stats-
Hours in car- 12
States driven through- Nevada and California
Number of times I almost barfed- 10
We are unpacked. There is food in the fridge. And the weather is gorgeous. We've been lucky to have four days of sunshine and cool weather. We went to the beach Saturday night and gave Maddy her first experience with the ocean, which was hysterical, by the way. Watching her discover the waves trying to chase her was priceless.
Yes, I'm homesick. For Cincinnati. I miss you guys a lot. I miss the idea of you. It's a whole different world out here. The neighbor really does sit on his porch and smoke for the whole world to see. I've never seen so many people with dreadlocks in my life. But everyone is an artist of some type or another. We have a crazy old dude who lives down the street. Our neighbor Amy warned us about him. Amy is a weaver who has a dog named Sally. Sally doesn't like Maddy too much... yet. Anyway, crazy old artist dude down the street has a giant ceramic head in his front yard. Along with a giant ceramic tree. I'm trying to get Maddy to pee on the creepy head. Hasn't happened yet.
Please call or email me. I'm desperate for a friendly voice!
Pictures to come soon. I keep trying but blogger won't let me post any. Maybe it's just my computer.
Love ya!
Friday, August 04, 2006
Farewell, my loves....
Last night was the Bon Voyage party at Mary's (come on, it'll never be Universal Grille to me- twill always be Mary's in my heart). Almost everyone I love was there to say goodbye and have a fabulous time.
The lovely Will Corson (Karaoke DJ to the stars) was there, spinning his tunes. I blew some smoke up his ass and brought him merlot all night long- in return, three songs I performed to an audience who knows me as The Queen of Queens. My first? Heartbreaker. Second, Promises in the Dark (I love me my Pat Benetar). And the third dedicated to my baby, Rob. Our song, At Last by Etta James. I brought down the house and was given a rose by a lovely stranger. Then got to sing with my pals to Seasons of Love from Rent. I brought out my inner black girl for that one.
Rob and I ended the evening at the Waffle House- our last foray in southern dining.
I wish I had more time to write, my friends. But as you know, the truck is being packed up today and time is at a premium.
I love you all. So much. I won't be able to post much for the next week, but keep coming back to see the news.
Collins, signing off.....
P.S. Enjoy the fun pics from last night!
The lovely Will Corson (Karaoke DJ to the stars) was there, spinning his tunes. I blew some smoke up his ass and brought him merlot all night long- in return, three songs I performed to an audience who knows me as The Queen of Queens. My first? Heartbreaker. Second, Promises in the Dark (I love me my Pat Benetar). And the third dedicated to my baby, Rob. Our song, At Last by Etta James. I brought down the house and was given a rose by a lovely stranger. Then got to sing with my pals to Seasons of Love from Rent. I brought out my inner black girl for that one.
Rob and I ended the evening at the Waffle House- our last foray in southern dining.
I wish I had more time to write, my friends. But as you know, the truck is being packed up today and time is at a premium.
I love you all. So much. I won't be able to post much for the next week, but keep coming back to see the news.
Collins, signing off.....
P.S. Enjoy the fun pics from last night!
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