Week in Review

Tomorrow, I begin Phase Two of Bob Greene's The Best Life Diet. Phase One, I upped my activity, didn't eat past 8pm, and gave up alcohol. Pretty easy, as I'm a pretty energetic girl (when I choose to be), and I don't drink more than a glass a wine every two weeks or so. However, I am a girl who likes her bedtime snacks. A warm vanilla steamer and a brownie would always help me sleep. Back in the Nati, I would also come home from Mary's after a night of Mary-oke, sit at the computer in my undies and eat Cocoa Puffs. Well, those days are long gone. I do not eat a morsel past 8pm... not even a grape. As far as Phase Two is concerned, this is when we begin to cut some calories. But by no means is this a "diet". This is a way of life, replacing fatty, non-nutritious foods with healthier alternatives. Bob Greene wants you to eat, it's one of the pleasures of being human. He just doesn't want you to sit down and eat an entire bag of potato chips for dinner (as I was prone to do in my early 20's). So, in Phase Two, he asks you to cut out 6 foods- fried foods, foods that contain trans fats, soda, white bread, regular pasta and high-fat dairy products. This will not be hard for me, as I don't drink soda, haven't eaten white bread since I was a teen, don't eat pasta, and very rarely consume dairy (lactose intolerance). Rob and I went to Applebee's this evening for dinner, and I was quite good. I was craving red meat, so instead of ordering the Riblet Platter, I ordered the Portabello and Steak Weight Watchers dish, and was quite satisfied! But I couldn't resist the Blue Ribbon Brownie- my last hurrah. Rob thinks I look sad in this photo. So long fried brownies and ice cream!! (am fighting the dairy cramps as I type)


After many emails back and forth, I have secured myself a place to teach Kindermusik upon my return to the QC. I am very excited, as this will be an independant contractor sort of thing, so I am still my own boss. I was quite worried about finding a space to teach once home, but Sheila, who owns her own Kindermusik biz, was happy to have me join. I think this will be a great start for me- eventually, I hope to branch out on my own in a few years. I am also very excited to get back to our piano, and have a home studio again. I miss teaching more than I ever thought I would, and I am desperate to get back and have some young mini-divas who need my guidance and support!

Next week is Spring Break. Not sure what I will do for 10 days straight and nothing to do. Hopefully the sun will be out some of those days, so I can get out and enjoy it.

Taxes are due soon- the bane of every self-employed teacher. Difficult, because it takes us nearly 3 hours every year to do them. We tend to write a lot of stuff off because, hey, we can! In turn, it's countless hours at the computer.

Only two months until our trip to the Nati as well as the QC. We can't wait to see all of you!!

Poor baby girl, still in her hat. I've been trying to get an appointment with this lady who grooms dogs with undercoats but she won't call me back. Bad for business, lady.

For nostalgia's sake

What is the sound of home? Or the smell? What happens to you when you have a nostalgic memory of your youth? I heard a Bob Seger song this morning, and instantly I was in our living room, circa 1987. My mom and Bert (my step-dad) got a new record player, and man did they play the hell out of that Bob Seger record. Hearing it this morning, I was instantly thrown back to being 9 years old, sitting in our living room on 38th street in Moline, with my Mr. Microphone wrapped in electrical tape and my electric guitar Bert made for me out of plywood.

There are memories I have, so distinct and fluid. It's as if I was just jumping back in time, and I'm right there. Since I have no sense of smell, it is hard for me to remember things by my nose. Sad to say, it's true, that I can't remember the smell of my grandmothers house, or the smell of a christmas tree. But in this case, all of my other senses are heightened. I remember in visions, of the way things feel on my skin, the way things taste. It is how I have lived my whole life, and that's okay.

It's funny, the way things pop into your mind. When I hear Def Leppard's "Love Bites", I am instantly taken to 1988, to our driveway. Bert, Tina (my sister) and I sat out on lawn chairs in the heat of an August summer and watched Haley's Comet streak across the night sky. When I hear Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'", I'm with my dear friend Dave in the summer of 1996. I can remember the feel of the air conditioning on my young skin, sitting with Dave in his bedroom, just waiting for him to make his move... he never did. Or hearing Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine, and I'm in the backseat of our sweaty, ancient Ford Escort station wagon, on our way to see them perform in Burlington, Iowa for some summer festival.

Not to say that I am living in the past. Quite the contrary, I am ready to get on with my life, which means getting out of here and starting our life in the QC. But I enjoy feeling nostalgic about certain moments in my life. It makes me feel as if I've not existed, but lived.

The first warm breeze in late April/early May, I can hear The Breeder's Cannonball and I'm at the Moline High School Fine Arts picnic at Riverside Park, playing volleyball with Gregg Lewis and Jeff DeLeon in 1994. I hear any song by the Spin Doctors (remember them?), and I'm thrown into the first year of my friendship with Lesley and the summer of Genesius Guild, 1993. I can taste a tater tot and I'm at the Sunset Grill/Big Papa's with the girls on Sunday nights. Or hear that Macy Gray tune that was so popular and I'm in my very first apartment in Bettendorf, a single girl out on her own.

I'm curious... what will I hear, or feel, or taste, that will remind me of my year on the ocean? I know I'm stronger and wiser for having come here. I'm more patient, I'm softer, I've changed. I'm finally a grown-up. I think all things I've experienced in my life have led me to this time and place, where I can finally realize that I'm no longer a "young adult". It's finally happened... adulthood. And the fun part for me is returning to the one place, where all those childhood memories live, and knowing how different I am than I was from when I left. It's going to be a blast.

Les Bleues

I made a realization tonight. I think I am depressed. Fully, deep in the hole depressed. And you know what? It's okay. There is a strong sense of release in saying that I think I very well may be depressed. It isn't the same kind of depression I suffered through back in 2000-2001. This isn't nearly as bad as that. I'm not laying in bed all day long, crying for no good reason. I'm not sleeping 12 hours a day. I don't have anxiety attacks, or trips to the therapist. I'm not taking my Wellbutrin once a day or spending long nights of writing in my journal how much I hated John for breaking my fragile, young heart. No. There is a sort of solace I take from this feeling. I simply have The Blues. I think I like having The Blues. Sure, I'd rather not be feeling them. But I understand now that this feeling is a product of my environment. Many factors lend to the blues. Being so far from everyone I love. The weather. My teeny tiny gray nasty ugly office, where I teach impoverished children the importance of numbers (something I'm not too passionate about). I haven't seen my Nati friends in months, or hardly spoken to them.

It takes a certain kind of strength to admit you have The Blues. To say to yourself, "Baby, it's okay to feel this way". When I had my bout with depression those years back, I tried so hard to push it away. To not deal with it. For those of you who have been diagnosed with clinical depression, you know what I'm talking about. There is a pain within you cannot even begin to think about, and can't understand why. I tried so hard to rationalize, to understand how I could have become so tense, so anxious, in such deep despair. I thought I had done it to myself. Luckily, I was never suicidal. I was just really, really sad. I would have anxiety attacks, two, three, four times a week. When my doc diagnosed me with depression/anxiety disorder, I was devestated. I felt inhuman. The hardest part personally was trying to get my family to understand. I love my mother, but she was the first to deny it. She would flipantly say "Oh you're not depressed! Stop being such a worry-wart". It was heartbreaking. More importantly, it pissed me off. I think my mom is part of that generation that tries to ignore things, thinking they will go away if you push it away long enough. Maybe that is why I pushed the ugly things about myself so far away those past few years- it was ingrained within me. I'm so glad I learned how to listen to myself... otherwise, I would've lost my husband, and so much more. And I'm proud to say I've been depression free for nearly 6 years.

Listening to yourself is cleansing. It may be a whole lot of hokem to some, but to me, it's the most important skill I've acquired in my (nearly) 30 years. You have to tell yourself it's okay to feel, and that means ALL of it. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I've tried very hard to stay positive while here in California. Sure, it's turned out to be just about the biggest mistake we've ever made, but I will say this... California has helped me to know myself, to love all the parts of myself, to love my husband in ways I never knew existed. Being here has made me realize what is really important, and where I need to be to feel whole. Pretty soon, the only blues I'll be feeling is listening to my old friend Shane play that sexy slide guitar on a stage in Bettendorf, Iowa. And that will be just fine with me.

Week in Review

Four months from today, we will be on the road, heading home. July 26 can't get here soon enough.


Poor puppy- Mrs. Pupperton is exiled to the E-collar due to some nasty hotspots on her belly. Hot spots are nasty, red, oozing sores that dogs with undercoats tend to often get when their dry skin flares up and the dog can't stop licking at it. We like to call this the "Astro-Pup" look.

Kindermusik has been going just great- only 12 more lessons to go! And get this... I emailed a lady who does KM in the QC and asked for her advice on how KM does in the QC... she wants me to come and teach with her at her space! Yahoo!! This was what was really freaking me out, trying to find a space to teach. She emailed me this morning and was quite excited to know I was coming into town. She wants to cut back on some of her hours due to her small children at home. What a great opportunity for the both of us! I don't have all the information just yet, but this is a great start!

Have also been doing much thinking about my theatre company, and have made great strides in what/how I want to get things done. The great news is that Ms. TracyEllen has expressed interest in helping out with the grant/fundraising side of things... maybe I could get her to be my Executive Producer...? (think of me rubbing my hands maniacally together, eyes wide and screeching Muhahahahah!!!!!)

It's been hard these past weeks, knowing that the move is so close. What has been the most difficult is trying to live my life here, and enjoy the things that are around me, all the while knowing that when we finally get to the QC, that is when my life can really start moving. Tom Petty was right, "The waiting is the hardest paert"- I love how he says "part". It's this f-ing limbo we are in here. I'm doing all I can so when we get home, things will be ready to get going... i.e., teaching Kindermusik, getting my home studio up and running, getting the theatre company off the ground. Planning is great, and it gets me to think outside the box... but it doesn't help being miserable HERE and NOW. Why isn't it June yet? At least in June, we get out of here for two weeks to see friends, go home, enjoy our time away from here.

Have the day off today- I just needed it. Spring Break is coming soon- that will be a much needed week of nothingness. Maybe I'll do some packing??

Randomeeze

While I sit here enjoying my chocolate-soy-banana-strawberry smoothie, thought I would post some random musings before I hit the cardio-pilates.

It's been a really great couple of days. It's Parent/Teacher conferences at the school this week, which means I'm out of there by 1pm. Nice. I get an extra hour to do whatever I please. This extra hour has been used to do some very soul-needing things.

Most of you know that we did not bring our Boston Grand piano with us when we moved to the West Coast. A few reasons, really. One, we could only afford a one-bedroom rental due to the high cost of living out here. The Boston needs her own room, and we didn't have it for her. She is patiently awaiting our return to the midwest at Rob's parents house. Although Gerry, Rob's mom, had it tuned by a dude with a hearing aid. Yes, I said hearing aid. When we came home at Christmas the piano was an entire half-step down. Ugh. We can't wait to get her back and treat her with some love and attention.

Maddy and the Boston, 2002

The past few months here have been hard on me, due to the fact that my livlihood has been crushed- I have no piano to practice with. Being a voice teacher, my privilege to sing for a living is compared to no other. Because no one wants to take voice lessons here, I have been feeling as if the life was sucked out of me. I missed singing, I missed the artistry of proper technique. I was in a funk.

Then the lightbulb went on in my head *ding!*. We have a keyboard in the closet! Granted it isn't a gorgeous Boston Grand, but it'll do. So the past few days, I've been singing like a crazy woman. I start off with my vocal function exercises- great for the "ladies" (other word for vocal chords, courtesy Patricia Linhart, diva extraordinaire). Pat taught these to me after my stint in the hospital with my appendectomy. Due to my asthma, the docs intibated me, leaving my chords split wide-open with no hope of coming back together to make beautiful music. Fuckers. I was right in the middle of a show, too. Anyway, VFE's bring the ladies back together even so gently- like a massage for the chords. I've been doing them for two years, and to this day, the ladies thank me! After VFE's, it's on to the practicing. And wow, do I sound good! It's been a long time coming, after not singing for months on end.

The Make-Shift Boston


The sun has decided to come out for an undetermined amount of time. The past few weeks has been more sun than rain, and it has definately improved our spirits. I still don't want to stay here, but it surely makes our time here less miserable.

With my extra hours this week, I also baked a beautiful blueberry pound cake. Wow was the sonva-bitch hard to make! But just look at it...

Yah, go ahead and say it... I'm a domestic diva. At least I like to think I am. I'm the quintessential maven of good taste, without all that Martha Stewart-like bullshit. And boy is that a good pound cake! I wanted to get it in before I start Phase Two in a week or so.

That's all to report. On to the pilates. Tah for now!

My Celebrity Look-alikes

This is so cool! I saw it over at Tracy's blog and had to have one for myself. Do I seriously look like Vanna White? Or Cindy Crawford? Weird, but super fun!

My cool celebrity look-alike collage from MyHeritage.com. Get one for yourself.

The Fear Inside

How I feel about getting the F out of here in 4 months...

Well, Mom and Bert made it to Lesley's mom's visitation. Mom said she gave Les a hug, and cried a little when she saw her. She said "Two of your friends have lost their mothers in less than 3 months", and that broke Mom's heart. When I spoke to Les Saturday afternoon, she seemed surprisingly in good spirits, all considering. Joyce's funeral is tomorrow, and I hope Les knows that both our thoughts, as well as all of those out of town, are with her and her family.

Today was a mildly sunny day, the clouds rolling in mid-afternoon. Rob and I took the time to drive up to McKinleyville and hiked on the Hammond Trail, which snakes along Clam Beach and the Pacific Ocean. The views were pretty minimal, but we got a nice hour of hiking in before we headed to Ramone's, our fave coffee shop in town for some iced Chai and a chocolate croissant. I spent the rest of the afternoon in the laundromat, studying Lesson Two in my Kindermusik training, came home and aced the quiz (picture Homer Simpson singing "I am so smart, S-M-R-T!").

Rob and I had a lovely discussion while hiking today. At times, I feel as if I'm holding back something within myself when it comes to my Kindermusik training. Or even when it comes to having a thriving vocal studio and theatre company. There is this inherant need to feel as if I'm working my ass off, unhappily mind you, to really feel as if I deserve to have a "happy" life. It led us to talk about what was really going to make us happy. I had simple answers... a big house, DIY-style, filled with comfortable but not extravagant items. I want to enjoy my career, my life, my time with people I love. I want enough money to live comfortably, again, not extravagantly, and be able to take a vacation once a year. I'd like to build my own darkroom in my basement. Pretty simple, wouldn't you say? But what is it that is inside us that feels we need to work our fingers to the bone to be able to have those sorts of things? Being a Kindermusik teacher, along with operating my own vocal studio, I'll be able to have all of those things, as well as the time to devote to a theatre collective. Why is it that I feel that I don't deserve it? Is it because I was raised by two people who worked their own fingers to the bone, and we didn't have a pot to piss in most of my childhood? I am proud of the fact that I came from a lower-middle class upbringing, because I am a success story. I was raised by two people who, against all odds, provided a loving home for my sister and I, and we came out with a bright, solid head on our shoulders, along with some wicked-ass street smarts to boot. But, on the other hand, I don't want to think the same way as my parents might have. I am a firm believer in the fact that we all make our own luck. We all have the power, skills and resources to make things happen for ourselves. We can make changes that empower us to be successful. I don't want to be a person who feels I was dealt a shitty hand (and I don't), and live by the mantra "Life's a bitch and then you die". As Americans, most of us feel like we have to WORK WORK WORK to enjoy our victories. Not so, my friends. Not so. Why have we been given a life in the first place? To suffer at the hands of our own fate? No thank you. I like to think the same way as Jack Dawson in Titanic... life is a gift, and I don't intend to waste it. Not on working a job I despise, or being around people who provide nothing but negative energy and sarcasm. I'm almost 30, I've been around the block a few times, and realize, you know what? It doesn't have to be that way. But often times, it is the fear inside that halts us from achieving the things we really want. Fear to fail, fear to succeed, fear to really know the ugly things about ourselves. I read a quote recently that said "Know your qualifications, realize your responsibilities, grasp your opportunities, banish fear to the sidelines- and success is inevitable". So why don't all of you get out there and figure out what it is that really makes you happy... and go for it?

I picked up my recent black and white roll from the shop. The latest project is food, for our dream kitchen we intend to have someday soon!

I love this shot. It was taken at a cooler in the organic food co-op here in town. Who doesn't love champagne?


Taken at Loleta Cheese Factory, Loleta CA.


Chocolat from Sjaaks, Old Town Eureka.


Chocolate Decadance Torte from Ramone's, Old Town Eureka.

Week in Review

I apologize for not posting at all this week. I've been doing some writing (which I'll post soon), as well as completing my lessons for Kindermusik training, so I've been a bit busy.

First and foremost, some of you know my best friend Lesley, who came to see Chess in May. She called me Thursday evening and informed us that her mom had passed away early that morning. Joyce, her mother, was stricken with colon cancer a few years back. She struggled with it for quite some time, then went into remission. Shortly after Les and Corey's wedding, they were informed it had come back. Joyce passed Thursday from what they think was a stroke or heart attack from the effects of the chemo. It was a bit unexpected for Les and her family. Her mom was a great lady! Our thoughts and sympathies are with her and her family.

It's been sort of strange around our house the last two days. I had a bit of a downward spiral, which is also why I haven't posted anything. If you recall, my other best friend Ann lost her mother right around Christmas. I can't imagine what my two girlfriends have gone/are going through. With Ann, we were there to talk to her, comfort her, and generally be around should she need us during the time of her mothers' passing. Due to the nature of Les' situation, we won't be able to get home. I can't even get a flight out of Eureka- yet another reason this place sucks so bad.
I couldn't help my emotional breakdown last night. I just sobbed for about five minutes, Rob holding me until it subsided. If I can't be there for my friend, what does that mean? And it also brings up a hairy point... it makes me think of my own mother's health. I worry about her and my stepdad. They don't eat very healthy foods, they don't exercise. It just really makes you think about the people in your lives and how important they are to you. I can't change them, but I do wish they would make better choices regarding their health.

Anyway, on to a lighter note...

Rob and I have been getting out of the house a lot lately. The more free time we have, the more we sit and sulk about how we aren't back home yet. We've been getting out and hiking a lot around the various areas close to our apartment. Last Sunday was a gorgeous, sunny 70 degree day. We took advantage of the rain-less weather and headed up to Trinidad. We packed a picnic, then hiked the mile-long trial that winds around Indian Head Island. It packs a beautiful punch, with views of the cove and ocean from various points around the island.

Cove Beach, Trinidad


Pacific Ocean, Trinidad


Rob and I, Trinidad


As far as The Best Life Diet goes, we are both doing fabulously. We are active every day, and we don't eat past 8pm. I can really tell a difference when I eat past this time, as I feel so awful the next morning! I won't lie, though, it was tough the first few days, not eating something right before bed. But now, I prefer not to!

Week in Review

Travel- While pining for the long-awaited trip we will be making in June (to come home for two weeks) as well as July (out of here for good), Rob and I decided to head out for a little road trip last Sunday. March, so far, has been a relatively dry month, with only a day or two of rain so far. The sun has come out for an undecided amount of time, and, quite frankly, I will not complain.
We stopped in at Loleta Cheese Factory, picked up some delicious goodies, and headed up the Mattole Road. This road heads up the mountain from Ferndale, and winds itself through the countryside until it reaches the Mendocino Coast, fervent with black sand beaches and rough ocean waters. From Ferndale to Cape Mendocino is a mere 24 miles, but due to the winding road, took us nearly 90 minutes. We wound back through the hills and stopped at a state park, having our cheese and goodies during our break. We then traveled back up the mountain, to see beautiful views from the precipice.

We finally ended back at Redcrest after a round trip of 60 miles that took 4 hours to drive, and headed home.

Movies- Sad to say, Rob and I haven't set foot in a movie theatre since leaving the Nati in August. We have two movie theatres here in Eureka (with a few others in outlaying areas) that are pretty ghetto. While you can see both The last King of Scotland or Venus, Dreamgirls is already gone. Due to the nature of these movie houses, Rob and I rely strongly on Blockbuster, which we ended up at the other night. We finally watched Little Miss Sunshine the other evening, which I will say is by far one of the best movies I have seen in years. The directors, Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, have a way of capturing the essence of true American life in all its beauty and heart-break. There is a scene at the beginning of the movie in which the family is getting ready for dinner. The father, played brilliantly by Greg Kinnear, calls to Olive, his daughter (Oscar-nominee Abigail Breslin) to come to dinner while the rest of the family is in a hustle to put dinner on the table. This scene was so normal, so eloquent, you feel as if you are watching a play. Each actor gives a real performance, especially funny-man Steve Carrell, who shows acting chops like you wouldn't believe. And little Breslin? What a talent. While I haven't seen Dreamgirls yet (I know, I know), I can't give a true opinion on who should have won Best Supporting Actor. However, Alan Arkin gives a tour-de-force performance as the heroin-snorting grandfather/dance coach of Olive. Michael Arndt, who won an Oscar for the screenplay, has a way of writing characters so real, so tangible, you have to wonder why this movie didn't win every Oscar it was up for. Wishful thinking of an independant-movie-lover, it's true. But if you haven't seen this movie, it's worth all the hype it's received the past few months. Get out and rent it.

The Best Life Diet-... is going pretty well. I've been stricken with nasty hormones this week, so chocolate has been constantly on my mind (and plate). But I'm still moving, getting in my activity, and enjoying the extra energy boost I'm receiving from it. First week in Phase One has been quite nice.

Career- Next Sunday, March 18, I begin my online training in Kindermusik, a child/parent music program for children under the age of 7. Kindermusik is much like Gymboree, which I taught for four years, and I think the training will be enjoyable and easy for me to get the hang of. Kindermusik operates under the assumption that "every child is musical", and shows the importance of music in a childs life! The training lasts 15 weeks, all online, and by July 8, I'll be a licensed Kindermusik teacher! The great thing about Kindermusik is that, once trained, I can teach just about anywhere. Most likely, I'll try to find a location (once we get home, of course) like a church rec room, the Y, a community center to teach at. All revenue is mine to keep, besides paying a minimal annual licensing fee. Kindermusik is a great way to make A LOT of money while doing something I love: teaching children about the world of music!

Days til we move- 137... that sounds like an eternity...

Months til we move- 4... still sounds too long...

Weeks til we move- 16... that sounds much better!

A night of Normalcy

Last night, Rob and I were invited to join the company of Ron and Melanie Kuhnel, two "movers and shakers" of the Eureka community. Ron and Melanie originally hale from Sacramento, but retired a few years back and moved up to Humboldt County. They bought an old "painted lady" and restored her back to her original beauty. They own a beautiful 3 acre block, just a few minutes from our place on G street, complete with a fenced-in community garden. Just fabulous! Both Ron and Melanie take classes at HSU in their free time, and Melanie is one of Rob's students. She is a sweet older lady, nearing her 70's, with white braids down to her knees. That's Humboldt County for you! Ron recently ran for City Council back in the fall, but sad to say was beat out by another democratic candidate.

The Carson Mansion is a beautiful historic house, built by lumber baron William Carson in 1886. With 18 amazing decorated rooms, it was bought in 1950 by a group of Eureka businessmen and turned into the Ingomar Club, a "gentleman's club" for the prominence of Eureka and nearby areas. The house has been lovingly restored, with the first level dedicated just to the bar/restaurant aspect of the business. The second floor features Mr. Carsons bedroom (off-limits to the public) and Mrs. Carsons' bedroom, which we were able to see. The second floor also features a card room with television if the members feel so inclined. The third floor features beautifully kept historical servants quarters, as well as the "ballroom", which now houses two billiard tables. As you can also see by the photo, there is a top "widows watch", which, during the day time, one can see out past the ocean as well as north to Arcata.


We had a lovely drink in the bar, then onto dinner, where we all dined on an indulgent salad bar and seafood meal. The service was sublime, and the food was tasty. What was really nice was sitting with two wise people, both bleeding heart liberals, who weren't afraid to talk about the state of the world, the politics, and the ultimate path of destruction our fair leader has lead us down the past 7 years. It was the first time in a long time Rob and I were able to discuss certain issues, then turn around and speak about something completely zany. It was a lovely evening.

I wasn't allowed to snap too many photos, so on a jaunt to the Ladies, I stole a few shots. Enjoy!

Looking at the front door/foyer from inside.


The Grand Staircase.

My Visual DNA

I saw this over at Jason's blog and thought it very interesting. Try it yourself- you'll be surprised at how well it reads you!

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Week in Review

Nothing too exciting has happened this week.... lots of personal changes going on, which I'll get to in a moment.

The big exciting news this week was that I felt my first earthquake, at 4:19 am last Monday. Very surreal, the feel of the shaking Earth and rumbling like you've never imagined. I am quite happy I was able to feel one while living here. So cool.

So, as many of you may recall, last October, I went down the road to a hip salon to get my hair cut. When I emerged from the salon (after what I can only imagine was maybe the third or fourth person she had ever given a haircut), I came home with the worst haircut I have ever seen. Now, I will say that most of my life, with the exception of my 4th through 8th grade years of "mullet head", I've lived a pretty charmed life when it comes to haircuts. I've been blessed with a head of thick, naturally red hair that basically does anything I ask it to. However, I came home, called the salon immediately to say how much I hated it, and the stylist told me to come back in the next day and she would fix it. Fine, I thought, maybe I was just using all the wrong words when describing what I wanted. Well, I left again with the majority of my hair thinned out, a "hole" in the back of my hair (what the F??????), and my usually soft locks feeling like straw. I came home and cried. I've never been "one of those women" who comes home and cries after a bad haircut. Like I said, I've been pretty lucky most of my life. Plus, while living in Cincinnati, I had Nikki. And Nikki, my friends? What a goddess. When we visited the Nati at Christmas time, both Rob and I made a pitstop to see her, and poor Nikki did what she could to save my ravaged head of hair. Well, that was 2 1/2 months ago, and the cut Nik gave me was growing out... weirdly. So, I decided, okay, I'm going to go to the same salon. It wasn't a reflection on the salon, just the awful stylist who cut my hair. When I called to make the appointment, the lovely receptionist listened to my story and placed me with Lindsey, who the receptionist said "gave me the best haircut I've ever had". Upon walking into the salon yesterday, I was very nervous. Okay, scared out of my head. But, Lindsey (who has years of experience on the other gal) listened to my wants and needs, explained everything she was doing while she did it, and all I can say is... WOW! This gal knows her shit. It actually looks, and feels, like I have a head of hair again. Lindsey described it as "bombshell". Purrrrrrrr. I hope she is right.

Okay, those personal changes.... no, we aren't having a baby... not just yet. Being here on the North Coast has been a miserable experience due to the weather, the people, etc.. To make ourselves feel better, we eat. We go out to eat, we go to Starbucks, we feed our emotions with going out. Yuck. So, now that we have a light at the end of the tunnel (our departure come July), we've decided to make some changes. In the fall of 2002, Rob and I joined Weight Watchers. In the first two months, I lost 20 pounds, and Rob close to 25. When all was said and done, I had lost 25 and Rob had lost 40! We didn't want to get married to each other feeling, and looking, awful. Ever since, we both have maintained a pretty good weight, but we both yo-yo with that extra 10 or so pounds. To understand how and why we eat, we decided to start Bob Greene's The Best Life Diet. While not really a diet at all, it is more of a way to live your best live through activity, proper nutritious eating, and to conquer the worst reason of weight gain, emotional eating. I myself have never really been an emotional eater. I just used to bury my emotions and ignore them- HA! Well, now that I don't do that anymore, I realize I just love certain foods. Rob, on the other hand, is an emotional eater. I think this plan will be good for him because the BL Diet deals with many different aspects. Bob Greene breaks it down into 3 phases. The first? Just get moving. For four weeks, you ramp up your activity. So, cardio and a little strength training. He asks you to give up nothing when it comes to food, and no calorie counting, in those first four weeks. And, most important, no weighing yourself! All he asks you to do is change your eating habits. Meaning, eat a nutritious breakfast, a snack mid-morning, lunch, a snack mid-afternoon, then dinner. And no eating after 8pm!! Once your body is use to eating this way (changing your metabolism), and ramping up your activity for four weeks, you can move on to phase two, where you begin to "cut calories". But with Bob's plan, it isn't so much eating like on a "diet". You still can eat the things you love, which I like, because it is very much like Weight Watchers. It's all about portion control and replacing those fatty foods you like with more nutritious ones. Once you enter phase two and start eating better and healthier, the weight will just drop off. You've changed your metabolism, changed how you workout, and then you begin eating better... how could the weight not fall off?! After four weeks in phase two, then you move onto phase three, which lasts your entire life. Healthy eating for life, working out and taking care of yourself, will in the end, give you your best life. Sounds good to me! Wish us luck!!!